Where To Make Friends

Where To Make Friends
Part One

By George Rusky
December 2004

Making friends today is getting more difficult than ever before.
I’ve asked tens of my clients how and especially when they had made friends. From all my respondents about 70 % found their classmates at a basic school
About 11% agreed and added high schoolmates and university mates.
The next making friend institution was work, clubs, common trips, recreation activities, and the like.

This quick and amateurish survey won’t hold any serious critic, but even done un-professionally, it gives a general overview of making friends.
Indeed, as we come back to the days of our childhood, we can agree, that the whole process of forming our buddies, even though based on likeness, was not at all complex.
Try to remember your first day at school. Wasn’t that the same?

I went to school at times when learners had to share a desk. I, for one, wanted to sit next to a boy and all I did, just asked him to join me at a desk. That simple.
Even then, we boys of six had their childish preferences.
After a while, some of the initial making friend’s steps had been remained and strengthened, while others went through some changes.

The end of the process of forming and developing close relations can be considered the graduation from the school. I believe that this period is the one that really makes friendship strong and long- living.
I’ve even met a couple of former classmates who then got married.

My respondents agreed that university studies didn’t bring a lot of chances to make new friends.
Why?
Most probably, there’s not much to draw students together.
Lectures? Hardly so. Big auditorium, voluntarily attendance, individual tests.
Students have few chances to meet and become friends. Agree?

Work. Nice place to make friends. Right?
Well, yes and no. First of all, who with?
The one who occupies the same position as you? Possible.
Don’t forget, however, that in this competitive world everyone has an chance for a promotion, which might destroy good terms.
Your superior? Good, if only she doesn’t thing you want to ‘dig a hole for her’
and overtake her position.
Your subordinate? If you don’t yourself think of losing your chair.
Someone from another company, operating on the market in the same industry?
Forget it! You’ll be immediately calculated as a potential commercial secrets deliverer.

So, what?
If someone had to move to explore new territories, and left all his ‘old guard’ at home, is she doomed?
Almost so. Yet, there’s a slight ray of hope.
Consider these places where it is still possible to gain some acquaintances with the hope that they may become your friends.

1. Clubs.
This is where birds of the feather rub shoulders. Membership gives you, sort of guarantee that you may meet the one you’ve been looking for.

2. Education centers for learning new skills: language courses, writing courses, mountain climbing training, playing games and other activities where folks of similar interests go.

3. Church is another great place to meet nice people. In many congregations church-goers dine together, organize trips, visit exhibitions, discuss various life problems.

4. Dating agencies. I, personally, dislike this way of meeting new people and have no experience of that kind, but it looks these businesses are getting quite popular.

5. If you live abroad, cafés, restaurants run by your compatriots where English is spoken. Places full of potential, with lots of openings to meet someone.

6. Our list of making friends ‘establishments’ will definitely not be complete, if we pay no attention to the Internet, this ‘Monster’ of knowing all.

But, this is a topic of our next talk. Let’s call it:”How To Make Friends On The Internet?”
So, till tomorrow!
Oh, I‘ve nearly forgotten. Think of your experience with making friends on the Internet, prepare notes, and tomorrow, while reading my article, just tick the same or similar points and add mine, if you like them, O.K.?