Dear Friends
Working with my adult students, I often hear their concerns about children education.
I am a good listener and always want to help as much as I can, but even though my wife and I have brought up two sons, I do not feel qualified enough for giving good advice and solid recommendations to my listeners in the area of children education.
As it happens to me in such instances, I addressed to the wisest of this world -Jewish men and women and found these great materials written by Miriam Levi.
I immediately accepted these instructions with no doubts and felt obliged to share these great ideas with you, my dear readers so that you could enjoy the treasures of these methods and approaches and use them in your hard process of education of your kids.
Good luck!
George Rusky
Lesson One: Learn to control your emotions.
According to this theory, our thinking - the kind of inner speech, a special conversation with ourselves. Sometimes we are aware of these internal dialogues, and sometimes they go unconscious, so quickly and subtly that we can not see them. But we know very well the feelings and actions are born out of these conversations in our minds. We can train yourself to identify upsets us the thoughts that make us go out of ourselves and lead us to failure. We can find out those beliefs and expectations on which they are based, and gradually change them. This will lead to a less stressful, more balanced emotional state. When we learn to control and prevent the feelings that lead to inexplicable defensive reaction, self-defense (rapidly turning into aggression against the one in whom we see a threat and danger to us, for the state in which we prefer to stay), we can create steady habits. And when we learn to control their feelings, we will be able to better cope with the problems of education.
Working with my adult students, I often hear their concerns about children education.
I am a good listener and always want to help as much as I can, but even though my wife and I have brought up two sons, I do not feel qualified enough for giving good advice and solid recommendations to my listeners in the area of children education.
As it happens to me in such instances, I addressed to the wisest of this world -Jewish men and women and found these great materials written by Miriam Levi.
I immediately accepted these instructions with no doubts and felt obliged to share these great ideas with you, my dear readers so that you could enjoy the treasures of these methods and approaches and use them in your hard process of education of your kids.
Good luck!
George Rusky
Lesson One: Learn to control your emotions.
The hardest thing for parents in the education of children - to deal with their own emotions. "What can I do? - Said one of the mothers. -I know I should not be angry, but when my kids start fighting, I'm just losing my mind, I do not remember myself and before will understand what I'm doing is yelling and swearing. " Here are the words of another mother, "When I was tearing at my children, I feel so guilty that later, trying to get along with them,I start them all over indulge. "Educators understand that this expression of feelings - wrong response to children. And if we want to be parents, who operate effectively and successfully manage their duties, we must learn to control your feelings. And if we do not find a way to solve this problem, we would have to conduct endless struggle of attrition, to keep their feelings in check. And it will be very difficult to achieve in the education of the goals that we set ourselves.
Where do all these turbulent emotions come from? People often say,
Where do all these turbulent emotions come from? People often say,
"I went crazy on this" or "Oh, I made me feel so guilty," -
as if external events generate our emotions. But in terms of cognitive (rational) approach and modern knowledge, we are producing our feelings together with interpretations that give us all out. In other words, our emotions are not caused by external circumstances. On the contrary, most of our senses are defined by what we say to ourselves in our thoughts.
So, we feel what we think
According to this theory, our thinking - the kind of inner speech, a special conversation with ourselves. Sometimes we are aware of these internal dialogues, and sometimes they go unconscious, so quickly and subtly that we can not see them. But we know very well the feelings and actions are born out of these conversations in our minds. We can train yourself to identify upsets us the thoughts that make us go out of ourselves and lead us to failure. We can find out those beliefs and expectations on which they are based, and gradually change them. This will lead to a less stressful, more balanced emotional state. When we learn to control and prevent the feelings that lead to inexplicable defensive reaction, self-defense (rapidly turning into aggression against the one in whom we see a threat and danger to us, for the state in which we prefer to stay), we can create steady habits. And when we learn to control their feelings, we will be able to better cope with the problems of education.
In this article, we will focus on two of the most destructive and dangerous feelings that arise for parents when they are dealing with children. This are anger and guilt.
TBC
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